Tell Me I'm Here

Tell me I'm Here is one of those heartbreaking true stories of the lengths a mother will go to in order to help her son who has schizophrenia as well as developing a drug habit.

Anne Deveson is an Australian producer and writer who has 3 children and her eldest Jonathan begins to develop strange behaviour and is eventually diagnosed with schizophrenia.
Her search for something to help Jonathan even takes her to a progressive institute in India and in the meantime her children are quietly suffering. Granted she is aware of this and feels guilty for putting so much energy into only 1 of her children and you really feel for her trying to balance so many roles in her life. A lot of this book is set in the 70s/early 80s so it is also interesting to see issues that are still going on today back in that time period.


We had to read this book as one of the English texts in upper high school. I have re-read it several times and what really stands out is the amazing lengths Anne goes to in order to help her son. She is willing to try anything to bring her son back to what she remembers before his mental illness takes hold and while she goes on living her own life everything else to an extent is thrust into the background. You also emphasise with her other two children. Recently even Anne's daughter wrote her own book about that time in her life.

I really appreciated Anne's honesty and compassion for her son. This isn't a new book but I think (although I'm no expert on mental illness) its themes are still relevent for those suffering or living with those who have a mental illness. It's such a hard thing for other people to understand since it is not a physical illness but as this book shows it can have such an effect on ordinary families and the way they live their lives.

Perils of exercise

Unfortunately for my motivation levels I am trying a new healthy thing where I'm trying to make sure I exercise daily for at least half a hour. I play basketball one night a week and mixed netball another night but other than the occasional dog walk I was behaving rather like a sloth lately. I went to a ladies lunch last Tuesday where we had a guest speaker Dr Dingle, a west Australian doctor who has an extremely healthy attitude to eating, exercise, lifestyle factors etc. Anyway he sort of sparked this health kick.

His lecture was pretty motivating if not a bit overlong but he really was very enthusiastic. Anyway yesterday I set off for my 3rd walk of the week, ipod in ears with some very catchy 80s tunes helping me along at my local park/sports oval. Let me point out I was not even on the road or on a pathway, I was walking the perimeter of the oval when I was whistled at by a young guy in a red ute. I don't think it was the 'hey you're good looking' kind of whistle but more a 'hey I'm going to whistle really loudly and annoy and scare you' kind of whistle.

And even if it was a 'complimentary whistle' I wouldn't have liked that either. There were 3 guys at the park all doing some light jogging around: do they have to put up with any kind of verbal abuse?

It's just ridiculous that in this day and age I still feel self conscious while doing something as innocent as walking around a park trying to get some exercise. Usually I wait until a bit later to go for a walk/jog but then that also raises issues about safety especially when I have my headphones in and are not as aware as I should be.

When I got home I went and told my Dad, wondering what his opinion would be. He basically said not unkindly that I should be flattered. Thanks Dad. My mum, who'd had a few wines by this time was not too helpful either. My dad also piped in with the fact that he gets honked etc when he rides to work (my Dad is a really annoyingly healthy person who rides 15 kilometres to work and back frequently in the warmer months). I explained that this is because he rides on the road (as he is meant to as the paths are meant to be for pedestrians) and a lot of car drivers like to think they own the road and see him as an inconvenience.

I told him it's is not the same thing as I think I was just being singled out for being a youngish girl on my own walking.

If I had been with my boyfriend as I was the day before I really doubt it would have happened. I'm not sure if I'm overreacting or not but it did have me a bit upset yesterday and it did cut short my walk as I then felt more self conscious than ever. Do I now have to restrict my walking to just doing laps of the inner oval which doesn't have any cars near it? Am I an oversensitive crazy person? Time will tell.

The Lovely Bones

I guarantee most people have heard of this book by now but that doesn't diminish any of the love I have for the author, Alice Sebold, and her beautifully told story which came out in 2002.

Susie Salmon is your typical 14 year old girl and the story is told through her eyes. One day while walking home from school she is lured into an underground hidey hole by her neighbour George Harvey where he procedes to brutally rape and murder her. Throughout the story you do learn a bit baout George's character and his mindset and the things he continues to do after the murder but it's not the focus of the story.

Her view is then from that of her own personal heaven and how she comes to terms with her death and the reactions of her family.

Each family member reacts differently to the news of her death. Her mother eventually succumbs to an affair with the police investigator who is looking into the murder. Susie's father becomes consumed with trying to locate her killer. Her brother, Buckley becomes withdrawn and feels like he is living in the shadow of his dead sister.

I found this story to be so original whether that is because I have led such a sheltered literary life or whether it truly is, I don't mind or care. There are so many interesting elements: she has a 'counsellor' of sorts in Heaven, she regularly has a rush of dogs around her place in Heaven, and the moment when her dog from her time on earth is among those dogs is such a lovely scene.

The relationship that develops between Ruth and Susie once Susie has died is also intriguing. Ruth herself is a rather complex character with a strange supernatural power to be able to see events that happened in the past.

This book would have to be one of my favourites for its touching take on death and the afterlife and it's also a good look into grief and what can happen to a family when their world is turned upside down.

I looked on wikipedia (don't judge) and they have said that Ryan Gosling has pulled out of the film production citing 'creative differences', and now Mark Wahlburg is his replacement. Say it isn't so! Internet movie database is also confirming this, but I just can't picture Wahlburg as Susie's dad. But Susie is being played by Saoirse Ronan who played Briony in Atonement so I think that should be a good fit.

Good in Bed

Cannie Shapiro is a journalist who thinks she has a pretty good life, job, dog etc. She is on a break with her boyfriend of a few years, but isn't feeling particularly bad about it (she was the one who initiated the break) and is plodding along with life. Oh and she has a little weight problem, this does get mentioned many times and is the crux of the book in many ways.

Her life is turned upside down when her (soon to be ex) boyfriend, Bruce lands a regular column in a magazine titled Good In Bed and his first article is about the pain of loving a larger woman. Uh oh. Cannie confronts him and after going through a shame spiral, eventually decides she wants him back although as far as I, and a lot of other characters he has no great personality traits/personality.

Cannie also starts on a weight loss program and meets a kind doctor who she of course thinks is too old for her (and will prove to be major plot device later). She also interviews and then brfriends an unlikely celebrity through her work as a journalist and goes on a journey of self discovery about herself when she is confronted with various ups and downs. All is going along pretty well again for Cannie and then she is confronted with a challenge she didn't think would come along.

I quite enjoyed this book, although it was predictable in many ways and so many plot devices are used purely as ways for Cannie to 'get ahead'. I did find her anger towards the end of the book a little bit unrealistic. I understood why she was angry, but I'm not sure myself why I just didn't find it authentic for whatever reason.

But I also did enjoy not having to read about a 'trim neat blonde' (just an example) as seems to be the usual with a lot of chick lit. These 'trim' (man I hate that word, it conjures up images of society women who just grab a bite to eat here and there because they're so busy with their charity work) girls still do have their own flaws otherwise the stories would be too boring but they seem to have the perfect body to make up for their (usually pretty small) flaws. Overall about a 6.5 out of 10, nice homely kind of book I could easily read while eating my lunch at work.